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no.5 - a bi-weekly series of stories we've published
here is a story from issue 004, a wonderful diary dialogue between generations. we’re delighted to have another platform for our contributors’ work - incredible wide-ranging stories from everywhere that need to be heard. we genuinely love these pieces and can’t wait for you to read them too! here is the fifth of the series, from mnemotope issue 004.
Diary Dialogue / 1960 – 2024 / My grandmother & I
February 7th, 1960
Lovely mild day. George v. frustrated to be back
in Aberdeen and away from his beloved hills.
Went out to Collieston. Church. Long walk to
Ythan. Argument once again.
February 14th, 2024
It rained all day. Morning slipped into afternoon. I
stayed at home and watched people hurry by outside.
A good day to write.
February 16th, 1960
V. cold. Roads one solid sheet of ice. Letter from
home – they have had 12 inches of snow and
are snowed in. Tea and later long discussion
about future everything now seems much more
feasible.
February 17th, 1960
Bitterly cold. Roads all blocked. More snow and
frost. Didn’t do any visits, not worth the effort.
Fed up with the cold so went to bed early.
Wondering more and more whether I am doing
the right thing to leave in the autumn.
February 21st, 2024
The sky was grey in Brussels. Morning damp led to
downpours by the evening. I spent some time in
bookshops, browsing shelfs of pop-philosophy. I
bought a book called Blue in the film section. It made
me consider all the blues in my life. Nord station was
mess, rainwater and cracked cement. On the bus I
watched the reds, ambers and greens mix into a dark
city night soup.
February 25th, 1960
Wet thaw arrived. V. wet. Letter from mum, no
comments about the holiday. George got the flu
now. Went back to the office and got most things
up to date.
February 27th, 2024
Blue on blue. Spring feels like it’s on its way. Cycled
to the library with Flavie, hopping from one patch of
light to the next. Watched some men load an open
truck. Their laughter spilled down the alleyway.
Drinking coffee with Ben, he tells me the days are
getting longer. My coat flaps open in the wind, the zip
is broken.
February 28th, 1960
Glorious springlike day. George better. Wasted
time. Went to Buller Buchan. Terrific granite
cliffs. Mr.M v. annoyed with me. George v. sore
throat so we came back early. Ann – boats.
Irene – stock exchange.
February 28th, 2024
Today was very still, no gusts of wind or drops or rain.
A constant grey overhead. I spotted a black headed
gull while crossing the bridge. Easy to forget the sea
is only minutes away. Presented my ongoing work in
class. Thinking about soft protest and the ambiguous
nature of things. Grey skies as ambiguous things.
February 29th, 2024
Light hit our faces hard, duvet over our eyes. Warm
and wet outside. The cherry tree is starting to bud,
too close to the road. Sat in Petit Paradis, steamy
windows and a women who looked so alike a relative
I no longer see. Watched police cycle through the
rain. Said goodbye to Flavie, always difficult to let her
go. Later I found a pile of snow dumped in a car park.
Its whiteness was absurd.
March 1st, 2024
An inside day, writing and reading. Highlight was the
evening run through the park. Pink peaks in the
distance, beyond reach.
March 2nd, 1960
Long letter from home. Earthquake Agadir!
10,000 killed. Music – Schumann.
March 2nd, 2024
Early morning walk around the city. I found a
table in the sun. A women passed by calling for
her cat, strays followed her in vain. We climbed
up to the Byzantine Monastery, its bells rang in a
strange swing melody. Greek lunch in a taverna,
the honey and feta pie was so good.
Presentations in the park. Talked of fossil
hunters and Chinese railways. Ended the day
with Roger. Reminiscing over his weather from
home ‘My balcony is my whole world because
its so sunny’.
March 3rd, 2024
Early morning walk around the city. I found a table in
the sun. A women passed by calling for her cat,
strays followed her in vain. We climbed up to the
Byzantine Monastery, its bells rang in a strange swing
melody. Greek lunch in a taverna, the honey and feta
pie was so good. Presentations in the park. Talked of
fossil hunters and Chinese railways. Ended the day
with Roger. Reminiscing over his weather from home
‘My balcony is my whole world because its so sunny’.
March 4th, 2024
I woke up tired. My sleep is disturbed, missing that
someone. Bursting blue skies, white drifting clouds.
Coffee and a tiny croissant. Returned to the park of
yesterday, our work will be on its idiosyncrasies, its
forgotten past. Talked with a local who studied the
ancient western walls. Stories of people coming and
going, displaced and erased. Smoking again, feeling
repugnant. Tomorrow I will be better.
March 4th, 1960
Cold and fine. Usual, one rota case. Worked on v.
good lecture Mrs Klopper “France and Algeria”. Met
George, was awkward. Heard that Maisie and Bill are
coming to Glenmore. Really homesick for the first
time.
March 6th, 2024
The sun is back with its infinite blue skies. I read a
poem called Byzantium. ‘Breathless mouths may
summon’, ‘death-in-life and life-in-death’. Morning
coffee in the square. Met a man from Albania. I
planted my flowers. Walked the city and found the
gypsy camps. I have a question on my mind; why
make an image?
March 6th, 1960
V. windy and cold. George cleared up sticks so we
didn’t go to church. Bacon and cabbage. Mrs M in
great form - no arguments. Walked to Old Slaws sea
v. dirty. Heard terrific service in Broad Scots.
March 7th, 1960
Bitterly cold. Gulen arrived in - same as ever and very
sure of herself. Possibility of a job in Inverness.
Lunch. Mum and Dad phoned, wedding went like a
bomb, RAF types not so bad. Went round to see Miss
McCullock, Kathleen there.
March 8th, 1960
Snow, v. cold. Lunch with Gulen - she feels that with
the Institute she learnt what she can do. Went to see
‘Don Giovani’ quite good, some bits v.funny to me.
March 9th, 2024
I see green leaves in Thessaloniki. Last visit to the
square, I said my goodbyes. Coffee with Ana,
daydreaming of hiking in Portugal. I soon left, needing
some time for myself. Searched for a gift for Flavie
but I was faced with the bland fronts of high shopping
streets. I miss her. Dinner alone, Sukri pastry with
wine. The bus to the airport was full of sad people.
Flying home, home .. home?
March 11th, 2024
Grey unbroken skies. I felt in the wrong place
somehow. As if I was existing in a time beyond the
expected. Strange. Later, I had a discussion with Will
in the Grey Space, thinking of grandmothers and
grandchildren. Questioning who is my audience .. I
understand the concern but part of me feels like the
work speaks for itself, why try and define it? Burnt
some hummus in the evening, didn’t think I could get
that wrong. Writing at night was impossible, I’ll try
again tomorrow.
March 12th, 2024
Misty rain but warmer. Printed out my thesis, trying to
get past this mental block. Flavie upset, I want to help
but she has asked to be alone. Went for a run in the
evening and watched a movie recommended by
Adam called Cameraperson. Looking forward to
going home.
March 13th, 1960
Fine but cold and damp. Mrs Morrison a little better.
George and I went to church. Went for a walk across
the Moor by the lochs. Was surprised by George’s
new dev. of ambition.
March 13th, 2024
Warm, grey skies. Went to the library in the morning.
Later talked with Shadman, opened up some
unexplored depths to my work. Difficult evening,
feeling hurt and ashamed of my inability to think
beyond myself. Twisted emotions. Still, I got some
writing done.
March 14th, 2024
Sunny with emerald blue skies. Spotted some flowers
blooming while putting out the bins. The year is
moving on. Coffee with Flavie, she put on some blue
mascara, beautiful - making me feel lucky. Spent the
afternoon writing and reading. Climbed with Flavie,
Ben and Katla. My body feels tired, I want to feel
strong again.
March 15th, 2024
Early start, working a 10 hour shift in the coffee shop
by the train station. The air has lost its cold bite,
winter already feels like a fading memory. Thinking of
buying headphones, but why lose myself to the
world? Why make music such a private thing? Nice
evening watching Hannibal with Flavie.
March 16th, 2024
Dreams of travelling, never ending bus rides. Woke
up to impenetrable grey skies.
March 17th, 1960
V.cold. Donned shamrock. Only saw one other
person. Good tutorial with Ann. Have teached the
despondent stage and am having qualms about a
student. Don’t know what to do about leaving, seems
a pity to give up a job I like so much. George terrific
photo of Slains Castle!
March 18th, 1960
Can’t really remember what happened so it can’t be
of much note!
March 19th, 2024
Woke up to the light, no curtains in Flavie’s room
since the renovations. My mind felt jumbled,
reordered in my sleep. Morning class, feedback with
Don. Lunch with Flavie, walked her to the bus station.
Interview tomorrow in Brussels. Fingers crossed. As
we parted I looked behind me. A figure in green with
jet black hair growing smaller against the heavy sky. I
want to paint this scene, remember her in this
moment. Later I discussed the hidden layers of my
work with Sara. We also talked of dog hair and
asthma. Uneventful night, Joe and Michela came to
visit, they brought biscuits and talked of the night. Fell
asleep reading All The Pretty Horses.
March 20th, 1960
Not a very nice day. George and I went to church to the
hills first but the clouds came down v.cold. Had a look at
the sheers then went for a walk around the Morlich v.
beautiful pines, juniper and heather. S. fed - up with the
new road.
March 20th, 2024
Early start, worked in the cafe all morning. Felt
trapped inside looking out. Fresh air and sun on my
bike ride home. Climbed, felt fatigued, still a little sick.
Fell in and out of sleep while reading. Flavie came
back from Brussels, no luck with the job. Talking late,
daydreaming of our life together.
March 22nd, 2024
Misty rain. Grey sluggish light. 10 hour shift in the
cafe. Lots of time to read. Argument with Cata when I
came home, feeling disturbed. Flavie came over
later, talked of all the places we could move to in the
Summer.
March 23rd, 2024
Cold wind with sun and showers. Woke up early and
went to the flea market with Flavie. In an old bingo
hall, not much to look at but nice to be up early. Long
day of work in the cafe. Cycled home in a strange
dirty light. Greasy with pinks and yellows that turned
to blue as night fell in earnest. Show we move to
Lyon? Fell asleep reading, dreaming of mountains.
March 30th, 1960
Lovely day, lunch in park. Crocuses wonderful , didn’t
go out just the usual chores.
see you next time!
